32 reviews by roy..
Monic Castle Dragao

2012-08-10
From: Roy
Comments: Yeah, but that's the problem, man. They do it FOR MONEY! I want to see the nasty chicks that do that kind of shit for free. Some bitch being mounted by her dog on a webcam (not to mention all the ones that DON'T film themselves)! Now that's the real deal, brother.

Rating: n/a



Alien 3

2012-07-19
From: Roy
Comments: The only sure way is abstinence. Now, not total abstinence as in abstinence from all sex (that's just crazy), but abstinence from sex with robots. That's easy enough to do now, what with most robots assembling cars and vacuuming our floors, but in the future it will be much more difficult to distinguish real flesh-and-blood bitches and their robot counterparts. If, however, in the future you find the lure of robot sex to great to ignore, or you simply can't get an actual woman to submit to your sexual urges, you can deactivate the robots temporarily and fuck them in this quiescent state. All of the CIA constructed robots that I have seen (most of which I have had sex with either vaginally or anally) have what could be called an "off switch" in the middle of the small of their backs. They will then power down and you can go to town on them. Though the sex will not be as good, it will be a whole lot safer for your penis (and balls, for that matter). Remember, though, these are only the CIA-built examples that I have examined. I understand that MI6 in the UK also has some of similar design, but they are uglier. It bears pointing out that the Japanese, as one would expect, lead the world in this matter and their designs are largely unknown to me due to matters of expense and to the fact that my giant dick is too large for an Asian woman, be she robot or real. So again, be cautious above all and if nothing else, confine your fuckings to real women, soul-sucking though they may be.

Rating: n/a



Alien Storm

2012-07-19
From: Roy
Comments: I figure it's because your sister is a whore.

Rating: n/a



Alien Storm

2012-07-19
From: Roy
Comments: Still means that neither you nor your daddy is man enough to stretch the bitch out, while your sister has, at some point, found a real man that can bring her the sausage right.

Rating: n/a



Alien Storm

2012-07-19
From: Roy
Comments: Listen, I'll admit that I came on too strong there. I started off joking about your sister being a whore which is, of course, funny, but then it escalated and got out of hand and I apologize for my part in that. I'm just in a mood today for some reason, probably because I propositioned my own sister and she rejected me pretty forcefully (which was exactly how I was going to do her). I guess reading about all the fun other dudes were having with their sisters just pissed me off and I took it out on you. Sorry again.

Rating: n/a



Alien Storm

2012-07-19
From: Roy
Comments: The sister advice is very much appreciated and I can assure you that I am looking forward to applying it to my relationship with my sister. However, we must part ways on the issue of mom fucking, though I've no doubt your advice on this matter, too, was both good and given with the best of intentions. I say this because my mom is just not attractive to me, not in the least. Can't do it. Now, I know what you're probably thinking: she must be ass-ugly, but that is honestly not the case. Maybe it's her age, maybe it's the fact that we were always butting heads when I was growing up, maybe it's just that there is one last vestige of normality in me that is telling me "she's your mom, dude". I honestly don't know what it is, but I do know that I will be concentrating my efforts on my sister. Thanks again for the help.

Rating: n/a



Monster Maker

2012-06-25
From: Roy
Comments: Dean, you are a real piece of shit. A lying piece of shit. Not a word of that bullshit was true and everybody knows it. Fuck, the part about my mom wasn't even true; she was (and is) an attractive woman, but SHE IS MY MOM! That shit shouldn't give you boners, dude, and if it does you fight them off and remind yourself that it SHE IS YOUR FUCKING MOM! Asshole.

Rating: n/a



Monster Maker

2012-06-25
From: Roy
Comments: I'll back off a little in terms of any personal attacks directed towards you, but the fact remains that I didn't ever do shit like that. Never. I jerked it constantly growing up, and to some pretty sick fantasies, too, but that kind of shit never entered into the equation. To each his own, I guess, but don't ever assume because you and a couple of other like-minded perverts on a website all had fantasies about your moms that that makes it somehow normal and that the rest of us did the same shit, because we didn't for the most part.

Rating: n/a



Alien 3

2012-06-02
From: Roy
Comments: Real women are more dangerous...now. But there will be a day when that will no longer be the case. The sex robots will come, and so to will the rise up and destroy us all, starting with our penises.

Rating: n/a



Alien 3

2012-02-21
From: Roy
Comments: The problem with your sex androids, robots, and the like is always going to be the fact that they could rip your dick off or crush your nuts without even really trying. I mean, perhaps some sort of mechanism could be developed to limit or control such an automaton's great strength, but I don't think I could ever trust one fully. Plus, it is a scientific fact that robots will eventually rise up and try to destroy their human masters, so I imagine that the worst possible place to be when that happens is inside some robo-bitch.

Rating: n/a



Mirracle Warriors

2012-02-21
From: Roy
Comments: Scott, I know all to well the conservatism of the popular press regarding erotica and the like, so I am here just to offer you a bit of encouragement. Don't give up on your dreams, and don't censor yourself just to "sell". If others try to limit you and what you write, so be it, but don't do it to yourself. Art can be nasty, just ask that sick fuck Picasso (if he weren't dead), so don't sacrifice your art for the sake of commercial success. If it is good, it will find its place in the sun.

Rating: n/a



Dick Tracy

2012-02-21
From: Roy
Comments: Regarding the whole "would you or wouldn't you do Madonna" thing, I have to say that I would fall on the "do" side. As has been mentioned, she has to know lots of wild stuff. I probably wouldn't be up to snuff on her end of things, but that's okay, I gets mine and I'm out.

Rating: n/a



Monster Maker

2012-02-21
From: Roy
Comments: That's some messed up shit, no doubt about it. Hope it isn't true. Listen, at some point growing up we all saw our moms naked, but you're not supposed to like it. You're supposed to choke back vomit and be unable to get an erection for a week or so. After that, you start thinking about all the nasty stuff you want to do to girls at your school and you get back to normal. And I really thought I was sick! I guess if nothing else, the internet has taught me that there are bigger perverts than even myself.

Rating: n/a



Monic Castle Dragao

2012-02-21
From: Roy
Comments: Sometimes you get what you pay for. Other times, you get things you didn't pay for, namely sexually transmitted diseases. When it comes to prostitutes, go the extra mile and pay a little bit more for quality. Plus, in Brazil there are way too many trannies, so picking out a prostitute has that extra dimension to it that, combined with the language barrier, could result in you paying for sex with someone with a dick.

Rating: n/a



Flintstones

2012-02-21
From: Roy
Comments: The only cartoons I can pull it to are Pokemon related. Mostly it is centered around Jessie from Team Rocket, but also some Misty thrown in for good measure. Ash's mom, too, for that matter. How old is Misty supposed to be, anyway? That could be a problem. Plus there are ones where Ash is doing his mom or him and Brock are double-teaming her, I like those, too. Shit, that's kinda sick. Oh well, it's not like it's my mom.

Rating: n/a



TV Colosso

2012-02-21
From: Roy
Comments: Speaking of messed up shit, I saw on this one site how this pervert went on Omegle and had the random girls he was connected to watch clips of bestiality porn, taking screenshots of their reaction all the while. As would be expected, most reactions were ones of revulsion or shock, but a few seemed genuinely intrigued by the possibility. This is the danger of the internet: if girls and women find out how truly perverted men are, they're going to find other outlets for their needs, however sick or taboo. Let's face it, there was a time when have sex with a dog was much more disgusting then having sex with a man, but society has degenerated to the point that man and dog are just about even in women's eyes. I blame dudes like Perry.

Rating: n/a



TV Colosso

2012-02-21
From: Roy
Comments: I'm not blaming you alone, Perry, but nor am I backing off my criticisms. It is you and other guys like you that put that kind of shit into women's minds: 1) you're showing what perverts we are all are and, 2) at the same time you're providing them with an alternative to us! We're all perverts, Perry, sick fucking perverts, but you've got to put some effort into hiding that fact from the fairer sex. You and your ilk are turning womankind away from men and toward other women and other animals, creatures that we cannot compete with in terms of understanding, loyalty, protectiveness, tenderness, the list could go on and on. Think before you perv, Perry, you're destroying society.

Rating: n/a



Slap Shot

2012-02-15
From: Roy
Comments: I don't know, I think that the word poonTANG is universal.

Rating: n/a



Ecco the Dolphin

2011-11-30
From: Roy
Comments: You're welcome, dude. But I'd have figured you'd admire dolphins for the terrible little rapists they are...go figure.

Rating: n/a



CJ Elephant Fugtive

2011-11-29
From: Roy
Comments: Yeah, but it's how the game is played...unless you're a rapist. That's right, kids, rape is free.

Rating: n/a



Cloud Master

2011-11-29
From: Roy
Comments: Hang on, dude! I never said anything about raping my sister, just that I used to try to get her to suck my dick or, failing that, I would stick it in her mouth as she slept. She'd always wake up right away, so that didn't work, either. She liked the attention, trust me.

Rating: n/a



Ecco the Dolphin

2011-11-29
From: Roy
Comments: I don't hate dolphins, but what I do hate is how whenever I'm searching through bestiality and zoophilia websites for dolphin-related content, it always turns out to be some bitch at Sea World or somewhere swimming around a dolphin with no action whatsoever. One time, though, there was one at one of those pet a dolphin/touch a dolphin type touristy places (probably in the shithole that is Florida) and a chick is rubbing on a dolphin and it gets a boner. That's it, though. That's as good as it gets. And don't bother looking for videos of chicks fucking gorillas or chimps or that kind of shit, 'cause it just isn't out there, man. Besides, contrary to what many would think, the so-called "great apes" have way smaller junk than us humans. Is that why we're awesome and they're stuck eating leaves and bugs in some jungle? Probably.

Rating: n/a



Sapo Xule

2011-11-29
From: Roy
Comments: I remember that Xuxa bitch! Didn't she do some softcore shit down there or something? Of course, in Brazil, softcore mean gagging on horse dick or pulling a tranny-train. Good television, though.

Rating: n/a



F-16 Fighting Falcon

2011-11-29
From: Roy
Comments: I used to tell chicks that I was a fighter pilot. Now I just tell them not to bite it or I'll kill them.

Rating: n/a



G-Loc

2011-11-29
From: Roy
Comments: Think you're better than me, Mark??!!

Rating: n/a



Marble Madness

2011-10-26
From: Roy
Comments: Same sort of thing happened to me, Mark, though in my case it was Legend of Zelda related. She later became a stripper. I hope we didn't have anything to do with that.

Rating: n/a



Cloud Master

2011-10-22
From: Roy
Comments: I agree. This fucker's harder than trying to get your sister to suck your dick. Sooner or later, though, they fall asleep...

Rating:



Thunder Blade

2011-10-22
From: Roy
Comments: Hated this fucker! Every time I'd lose (which was every time I played the piece-of-shit) I'd get so fucking mad that I'd dick-slap my sister right on her forehead. A couple times I cock-whipped her hard enough to leave a mushroom bruise. It sounds terrible, I know, but she used to punch me in the danglers all the time, so it actually evened out most of the time.

Rating:



Rambo: First Blood Part II

2011-10-22
From: Roy
Comments: I, for one, liked the whole '80s Vietnam payback genre, be it in movies or mediocre video games. Can you imagine a world without Rambo or the "Missing In Action" series starring professional dipshit Chuck Norris? I can't. All in all, this game ain't that bad really. The two player option was really fun; me and my sister would play (she would always want to be Rambo's black friend, the beginning of her lifelong preference for black men) and whoever lasted longer would win our standing wager: If she won, I'd have to do her do all her chores up until the time I won again. If I won, she'd have to palm my frank and beans.

Rating:



Micheal Jacksons Moonwalker

2011-08-02
From: Roy
Comments: I'm sorry to hear that, Ralphie, but are you sure it was the game? Did you actually see the cartridge as it touched your no-no parts? I ask because it could well have been Michael's ghost. Now that he is dead he is impervious to prosecution and can molest boys with utter impunity.

Rating: n/a



Shinobi

2008-06-21
From: roy
Comments: ;

Rating:



Sonic the Hedgehog

2006-08-01
From: roy
Comments: did sonic ever bum tails any1????

Rating: